I Should've Known

           

            I still remember the first time I had an idea what love was. I was alone, watching A Walk To Remember. It was the very first romantic movie that made me burst out into tears. I've realized how unconditional love could get. You would expect nothing in return. There are no conditions in love. For me, it doesn't require anything.  It makes impossible things, possible. Indeed, love conquers all. It opened my heart to the possibilities that love could change you who you are.

            If falling in love means having butterflies in your stomach, blushing cheeks, sweaty palms...and other things that drive you crazy, then I can say I HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE. I may have my ideal boy but when cupid draws an arrow to you, you will throw that imaginary list. There's no expectation to meet anymore. Love is loving all the little things about that guy.

             In my own words, love is staying up all night and spending it by talking to that special someone. It seems like all you want is to talk to him. It doesn't matter if you talk over nonsense stuffs because he makes you feel so comfortable. You don't have to be fake and pretend you're someone who you're not really because he appreciates the real you. He would always tell you you're pretty and that you're super talented. He's your number one fan. He supports you with whatever you have to do. I don't know. It's sort of unexplainable. You feel worry-free and safe knowing that you got him. And most of all, you feel contented and happy whenever you think of him. He is your inspiration. He gives you millions of reasons to smile even though life gives you thousands of reasons to frown.

            Love is such a strong word that could make us the happiest person in the world yet it could also bring us so much pain. LOVE ISN'T ALWAYS ABOUT HAPPY ENDINGS. They said people are meant to fall in love with each other but are not meant to be together. It's unbelievable how a single person could take the biggest part of you. LOVE is feeling jealous or envy. LOVE is being happy even though the happy memories only exist in your mind. LOVE is smiling no matter how much you miss that person. LOVE causes you to feel like you are being punched against your chest. LOVE feels like you're a sunburn --- scarred and left.  LOVE is the force that makes you're world shattered down the floor in just a snap of a finger. LOVE is wishing you were a sober because all you want to do is to get drunk to feel a little love. LOVE is getting very desperate in bringing that special someone back but you really couldn't. LOVE is realizing that there's nothing left to do but to let go and move on with your life. But despite of all those pain you feel inside, LOVE is acting stupid but it isn't a big deal for you. LOVE is being ready to do anything because all you want is the happiness of that someone. Even if seeing him love someone else kills you, still, LOVE is being strong and happy for him. LOVE is knowing that you could not go back to the way it was before but still you accept it wholeheartedly. In short, LOVE is choosing his happiness over yours.

            I don't really have to define what love is. Of course everyone knows what it is already. All I'm saying is that LOVE is not only about happiness. Pain and suffering is also a part of it and that every hello ends with a goodbye. If you love, you should expect to be hurt as well. These hurtful experiences didn't exist for us to suffer emotionally but to teach us something worth the pain. But then again, love is the most special thing in this world. No one deserves to cry, to be hurt and to be neglected for our main purpose in this world is to give love.